Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
My penis needs a shock collar
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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