Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
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