After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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