Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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