After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
