I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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