I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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