like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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