If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
