So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
