Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
