Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Everclear isn't food dammit
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
