i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
pray to the hookup gods
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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