So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
