This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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