a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
