what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize