i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize