so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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