I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We had sex on a dog bed..
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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