How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
