NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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