Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
