Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
