Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
