maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
