so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize