You just made me feel so damn special
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize