oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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