john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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