i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
