i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
