Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
That was before I lit my hair on fire
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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