well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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