So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize