It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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