Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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