I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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