dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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