is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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