everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
