tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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