So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize