she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
