Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
