Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
