Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
