I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize