When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
