well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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