I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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